Tolerations

We all have things in our lives that we’re just tolerating. Things we don’t like, things that annoy us, things that stress us out, and things that get under our skin and make us so angry we just want to scream. Sometimes these things that we’re tolerating can cause us anxiety and distress, and we need to talk about them, and find a way to either change our perspective of the toleration or find a new way to tolerate them.

What are you tolerating right now? How much harm is it causing you mentally/physically/emotionally?

What are the results of the thing you are tolerating? What does it mean to have this toleration?

Who or what is causing the thing you are tolerating? Are they aware of it?  Have you talked to them about it? How much of the toleration is it up to you to deal with alone, and how much of it is a joint effort to resolve?

Is the thing you’re tolerating something that can be fixed? If so, how can it be fixed? What steps would it take to fix this problem?

How temporary is the thing you’re tolerating? Is it a short-term toleration, or a long-term toleration? What does it mean to be a short/long term toleration? Does it change the significance of the toleration?

What are you telling yourself about the thing you are tolerating? How helpful or rational is it? Is there a different narrative or meaning you could tell yourself about the toleration that will make it easier to deal with? What does it mean to have this thing that you’re tolerating?

What will it take to feel better about what you’re tolerating? What will you need to make this happen? What are the steps to accomplish that need? What’s standing in your way? How can you address the things standing in your way?

Is the thing you are tolerating a symptom of a bigger problem or issue? How will you know what the true issue is? Once you know, what will you do?

Sometimes it’s a perspective shift that will help with a toleration, sometimes there’s a bigger problem that needs to be addressed, and sometimes the toleration is only temporary and will go away in time. What does your toleration fall under (if not multiple categories)? Is there another resolution that I didn’t address? If so, what is it?

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